Since it is only a couple days after Christmas I thought I
might try something a little different in the blog this time. All of you are probably still in the giving
spirit or in the spirits. So there is no sense in me trying to be too
analytical. Many of you are already sick of shopping and you have returned
most of your gifts to Walmart so you are open for diversion. Those of you with
visiting relatives are posting signs on your refrigerator that indicate that
fish and visitors begin to smell after three days.
But this is a MACRO blog and I can’t just blather on about
post-Christmas blahs. So what I am going to do is provide you with my forecasts
for 2012.
First Peyton Manning will overcome
his neck injury and will star with Kim Kardashian in a new reality TV show
about the art of hiking a football. I won’t say who will play center but some
of you wise guys have already figured it out.
Second, the Indiana University
Football Team will win the conference championship in 2012 but will not be
bowl-eligible because high school conference winners are not allowed to compete
at the university level.
Third, the US election in 2012 will
be won by David Letterman. He will run on the Funny Party Ticket arguing that
the current batch of DC politicians are not funny and he is.
Fourth, the euro currency will go
out of use and will be replaced by the Hungarian forint.
Fifth, Andra Klemkosky will replace
Robert Klemkosky as the Dean of Business at SungKyunKwan University in Seoul.
Sixth, small business owners will
be given a new Eli Lilly growth hormone so they are not so small.
Seventh, with the FDA closed for
roof repair, any drug having gone through testing by movie stars at the Betty
Ford Clinic will be approved and available for immediate sale at whatever price
the market will bear.
Eighth, Pharmaceutical
companies, Cook Medical, the Post
Office, and Topless Bars in DC will become government enterprises managed jointly
by Kim Jung Un and the Donald.
Ninth, Vietnam, North Korea, Sanibel
Island, and Ireland will become the 59th and 60th states
of the USA.
Tenth, US rich people will be asked
to move to Nova Scotia and Latvia but will be required to send their pay checks
to President Letterman.
Eleventh, poverty status will be
extended to all remaining US citizens so there will be no need for anyone to
have to work or even pretend to work. The unemployment rate, therefore, will
fall to zero percent, the lowest level in 362 years, guaranteeing re-election of the Letterman
/Bashar al-Assad ticket.
Twelfth, world GDP will be equal to
this year’s plus or minus.
Thirteenth, I cannot remember where
I left my car keys and the 13th thing.
I hope you are having a great holiday with lots of spirits
and whatever else your usual holiday rituals might dictate. Please do not harm your relatives
because some of them might be planning to leave you money. I look forward to
bringing you more Macrocrapola in the New Year.